
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/49853.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      Multi
  Fandom:
      Persona_Trinity_Soul
  Relationship:
      Jun_Kanzato/Yuki_Kanzato, Jun_Kanzato/Soutarou_Seno
  Character:
      Jun_Kanzato, Yuki_Kanzato, Soutarou_Seno
  Additional Tags:
      Incest, Gender_Issues, Crossdressing, Sharing_a_Body
  Stats:
      Published: 2010-01-12 Words: 2764
****** Trace the Shadows ******
by CountlessUntruths_(KaliCephirot)
Summary
     So when Yuki whispers 'please, Jun?', so that Jun can almost feel her
     he sighs and nods, even though she can't see it, even though it's not
     needed, for her to know he agrees.
Trace_the_Shadows.
And girls like me can trace the shadows as they fade away
Running from the sun and dying at the end of day
Girls like me can shed your body, lose this extra weight
We'll cut your throat if that's what it will take for twins to separate
"G.L.M" Thou Shall Not
It was always hard for him to tell Yuki 'no' when they were children. She was
always the outgoing twin, the one with the ideas, the one with the penchant for
adventure, the one who always got them into troubles and out of them.
That hasn't changed now, but it's... different, with them sharing just one
body. Yuki doesn't ask for many things these days. They talk, as much as the
possibly can when they're not supposed to do so, but that's hardly anything.
But every now and then, Yuki will whisper a 'please, Jun?' and then he'll get
himself a parfait, even though he doesn't like sweets that much, or buy a
girl's magazine for her to read.
Or buy girl's clothes and he'll wear them and then give Yuki as much freedom as
she can when they still have to share his body. It's the least he can do, Jun
thinks, when he's alive and breathing and all Yuki has is her voice inside him,
him to experience everything she won't.
So when Yuki whispers 'please, Jun?', breeze soft against him, so that Jun can
almost feel her arms around his shoulders and her body against his he sighs and
nods, even though she can't see it, even though it's not needed, for her to
know that he agrees. He stands up from his bed, digs through his closet to
bring out the bag he has hidden inside. He used to worry about it, when Shin
and they lived back in Tokyo with their aunt, worried that Shin would find it
even tough he always knew that Shin would understand it, but it never happened.
Now that they live in a dorm room, he has to worry even less. Shin hasn't been
himself since Ryou disappeared and Eiko-neechan died.
He puts the smaller bag inside his school bag, stuffing some notebooks just in
case, though Yuki tells him he shouldn't bother.
"Even so," Jun whispers at her, walking out and towards the room that Shin
shares with Takuro, leaning inside a bit, looking around. "Shin-niichan?"
He walks inside, and then both he and Yuki sigh. Shin has fallen asleep once
again at his desk, arms folded on top of it, an smudged drawing beneath him,
Ryou-niichan there on the paper. It's been four months with no news, with no
chance of closure. Even he and Yuki don't know if Ryou-niichan is alive or not
after that one, lone moment when they were sure he was gone. Nowadays Yuki is
adamant that he must be alive still, somewhere and Jun sometimes feels like a
traitor for daring to think that he's not sure. And Shin-niichan, always with
his heart on his sleeve, not wanting to believe that their older brother could
have had anything to do with Eiko-neechan's death, not wanting to believe
they're gone.
Yuki slips through him, and it's her voice in his lips when they shake Shin's
shoulder, it's her all over the way his eyes soften for their older brother.
Shin-niichan looks too thin, shadows under his eyes: he has been having
nightmares again.
"Shin-niichan," she whispers gently.
Shin frowns a bit, obviously wishing that they wouldn't wake him up, but he
opens his eyes, looking at him. At them. Yuki smiles with his lips.
"You should sleep on your bed, niichan," Yuki chides him. "Your back is going
to hurt you again."
Shin blinks sleepily, his head still pillowed on his arms. "You going out?"
"Mmm, to the library," Yuki lies easily enough. Jun has never been as good as
her to simply say something like that on the spot. "I'll be back before
dinner."
Their brother yawns, stretching, and they both wince when they hear his back
popping in several places. "Want me to go with you?"
"It's okay, niichan, I'll be back soon," Yuki says with a smile. "You should
sleep some more! I'm gonna tell Kanaru-san and Megumi-san that you're going to
be sleeping, and if you don't do it, for them to punish you! Megumi-san will
agree with me."
That, at least, makes Shin laugh for a bit, the way he has slowly started doing
again lately. It makes them both feel warm, warmer than the spring air that
comes through the open window.
"You nag too much, Jun," Shin tells them, but he sits down on his bed, then
rolling to his side the way he always does when he's about to fall asleep.
"Don't forget your cellphone."
"And you say I nag," Jun mutters, Yuki giggling inside him, and then he closes
the door.
*
Once outside, it's simply a matter of finding an empty bathroom and changing
out of Jun's clothes. It doesn't matter how many times he has done it, it
always feels a bit weird, stepping out of his clothes, putting on the ones that
Yuki chose. Yuki chose black stockings this time, but they make it somewhat
softer by putting socks on top, folding them around his ankles, the way that
sometimes Kanaru-san does it. He puts on the panties, the skirt that he bought
that looks similar enough to the school uniform one. Then there's the bra, and
by now he's an expert on how to put tissue inside so that it look real. It's
still his shirt and school jacket on, even as he tie the ribbon around his
neck.
And then, the final touch is the wig. It took them almost a whole year before
they found out a wig that looked real enough and that had the same ashen color
that Yuki's hair used to be, a darker tone than Jun's hair is. Jun combs it
carefully, leaving it down, simply putting a hair band. He touches the mirror
once he's done, the way he always does with any mirror at all and then it's
Yuki looking back at them through the mirror for once, not Jun.
Ready? Yuki asks. Jun likes to think he can feel her breath against his cheek,
where she'd be leaning against him.
"Yeah," he mutters, and then he closes his eyes. Yuki passes through and then
it's her moving his body, mostly, while Jun waits on the back, a passenger on
his own body. Yuki smiles at the mirror and twirls so that the skirt flips
around Jun's legs, and then she picks up the bag, paying for a locker to put it
inside.
She avoids the store where Takuro-san works, going to the other, more expensive
stores to look around. They can't afford to buy girl's clothes often, knowing
that it would be too obvious, but Yuki walks inside the stores and she smiles
at the mirrors as she puts clothes in front of her, asking for his opinion. She
buys bracelets that Jun can't wear and she puts them on, considers earrings and
good luck charms, and then she buys a parfait and she eats it as slowly as she
possibly can, enjoying this brief moment of freedom, all that Jun can do for
his twin.
"Don't sulk, Jun," Yuki chides him, pressing a hand to their heart as if he
didn't know that, if she could, she would spend this time with Shin-niichan.
"I'm fine, right? We're fine."
They feel him before they see him, and it's still not enough. Yuki turns
around, dropping what's left of her dessert, ready to run, but Soutarou's hand
closes around his wrist.
"Oh? Who do we have here?" Soutarou smirks a bit, cocking his head to the side.
"I almost didn't recognize you, dressed like that."
Jun feels himself flushing, but it's still Yuki's voice.
"Shin-niichan isn't around here," she says, and then she glares, a bit. "Do you
know where's Ryou-niichan? Tell me, please!"
Soutarou shakes his head, letting go of his arm. He shrugs, the smile still on
his face. "I don't know why I'd have to tell you anything, eh, Jun?"
Maybe if we offer our Persona, Yuki thinks inside of him, and Jun agrees,
starts trying to think about how to tell him, wondering if Mayuri-san hasn't
told them. She must have, they're certain of that, but before they can start,
Soutarou has gotten closer to them. He's taller than Jun is, so he has to look
up. Soutarou still smirks.
"You do make a very cute girl, you know?" he says, trailing his fingers through
the wig, leaning closer. One of his hands settles on his waist. "Want to go on
date?"
He should say no, and he knows it. They would be glad to help the guys at
Marebito, but not like this, not without letting Shin know. They don't want him
to have more nightmares, to worry anymore. But Yuki makes their breath to
quicken, and he can feel her, wanting to press closer, to have almost this
attention.
Please, Jun.
He can't say no to Yuki.
**
Soutarou doesn't take them far away, he just takes his wrist and takes him (and
Yuki, even though he doesn't know that) through them until they're alone,
pressing him against the wall. Jun wants to close his eyes but Yuki doesn't let
him until Soutarou's mouth is against his, until Soutarou is kissing him.
Kissing them.
It's not a soft kiss, by far. He and Yuki don't have any experience, but
Soutarou presses his body hard against Jun's, touches his tongue to Jun's mouth
until Jun opens his lips, the kiss almost bruising. Soutarou pushes a leg
between Jun's and Jun feels himself flushing: with the skirt he's wearing it's
really easy to feel Soutarou's thigh, really hard not to just push against it.
He can feel himself getting hard.
Soutarou lets go of his mouth, moves towards his neck and he bites, hard enough
that Jun flinches. It's going to leave a mark, and he has no idea how he's
going to hide it from Shin. Yuki moans through his lips, and Jun clings to
Soutarou's arms, feeling the way his legs are trembling
"Never done this before, huh?" Soutarou asks, chuckling against his neck.
No, Jun thinks, but they have thought about it, for what it seems a thousand
times. But it's hard, just like everything with them is. They think of girls
and boys and they're never sure who's thinking about who, about what, and even
just a simple thing like masturbating is difficult, sometimes, when there's no
privacy, when they can't turn around when they're sharing one body, one heart.
Soutarou moves a hand between them, pressing it against Jun's crotch, rubbing
at his cock over the skirt.
"Want to do it, then?" Soutarou asks, searching his face. Jun is struck by the
fear in his eyes, wondering if Soutarou knows about it at all, or if he has
lied to himself so much that he pretends it doesn't exist. "Eh, Jun-chan?"
Soutaro's hand moves under the hem of the skirt, under the panties, closing
around his cock and Jun feels the way Yuki and he gasp. It's impossible, this
time, for them to pretend that one is not feeling what the other is feeling,
this time absolutely impossible to pretend that one of them is in the back;
Yuki is right there, so close that he can almost believe he would touch her if
he simply reached for her.
Jun... Yuki whispers.
"Yes," Jun answers, cutting through Yuki's words, not wanting to listen to her.
"Well," Soutaro looks at him and then he smirks, shaking his head, letting go
of him. "Turn around."
Jun pays attention to the way the wall feels against his hands, to the way it
rubs against his face, to anything and everything as he hears a plastic tearing
sound before he feels Soutaro's fingers wet against his hole, and he does his
best not to tense. He still gasps when one of Soutaro's fingers push inside,
shifting his legs a bit wider, tries moving against Soutarou's hand.
"Oh?" Soutarou croons, pressed against his back as he is. He pushes his finger
again and Jun gasps, moving his own hand to cover his mouth. "Are you that
desperate for it, then?"
He withdraws his finger, then pushing in with two, Jun gasps, still covering
his mouth. Soutarou isn't being particularly careful but he's not being
vicious, either, giving him enough time to get used to the feeling of fingers
in his hole, to something spreading him over. Yuki is eerily quiet inside of
him, but Jun doesn't want to focus on that, not right now. He uncovers his
mouth, instead moving his hand to wrap around his cock, stroking it, simply
wanting not to think, for once, having nothing to focus on but the way his
heart beats, the way Soutarou's fingers stretch his hole.
Soutarou bites the back of his neck again as he takes out his fingers. Jun
feels his legs shaking as the plastic tearing sound repeats itself, and then
Soutarou's cock presses to his hole. Jun takes a deep breath and then he loses
it as Soutarou presses inside him, an arm wrapped around his chest, his other
hand on his hip.
"So tight..." Soutarou gasps against his ear. "Almost like a real girl."
Jun bites his lips, stroking his cock. Don't think. Don't think, just like
this. His heart is beating wildly inside his chest and he has stopped trying
not to moan. One of Soutarou's hands curl tight around his shoulder, to pull
him closer, silent but for the way he's huffing against his neck, so close that
it's easier than breathing to hear his thoughts, his needs, so that Jun isn't
sure if he's coming because he wanted to or because Soutarou was thinking about
how good it would feel once he did.
Soutarou bites his neck again as he comes, moving his hips slowly as he
finishes. Jun's legs are trembling, his hands dirty with come and the dirt of
the wall, and he just feels tired. Even though Soutarou used a condom, he wants
a bath.
"Not bad," Soutarou says as he pulls out. Jun winces a bit, but at least he can
lean a little more of his weight against the wall. Jun doesn't quite pull the
panties on yet. "Say 'hi' to your brother from me."
**
"Jun!" Shin is laughing, actually laughing, some sort of movie on the TV.
Takuro-san is laughing as well, and even Kanaru-san and Megumi-san are
laughing. Shin's eyes are bright for the first time in what seems forever.
"We're having pizza! We're all putting in some money, so, what do you want in
yours?"
"Sorry, niichan," he says, not quite pausing. "I was hungry so I ate before
coming home. Maybe save me a slice?"
He doesn't wait for Shin to say of course. Even if he hadn't said a thing, Shin
would have still saved him two slices. One for Jun, and one for Yuki. It's
always like this.
Jun lies down on his bed, curls around his side. He should go and take a bath.
Jun, Yuki says, the first time she has spoken to him at all since he ignored
her before. Are you mad? I'm sorry...
And she is, he knows it. It was always like this, too, when they were small,
when they were two and they could be apart. If Yuki did something that actually
hurt him, she would go to him and hug him tightly, because once upon a time
they were one and then they were two and back then it had been unfair, that.
And now, they are two but they're just one, just him, and that's unfair, too,
but he knows that's not her fault, and he knows he shouldn't feel like this, he
shouldn't be so selfish about this.
"Don't sulk, Yuki," he whispers, closing his eyes, trying to imagine that Yuki
is actually in front of him, that he can hold her hand the way he's thinking of
doing right now (the way that she's thinking of doing right now), "I'm fine,
right? We're fine."
She doesn't believe it, and neither does he, but they know better than saying
anything at all, so Jun just closes his eyes, curls tightly on his side, while
Yuki falls silent inside him once again.
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